New teacher~ feeling intimidated. What to do?

lizaj

New member
I always think of "real " women as being those whose bits are mostly not add-ons.
It's probably a generation thing but breast reconstruction is for post surgery. You grow into your face and cosmetic surgery is for those who have had accidents or have real disfigurements. You celebrate or live with your curves or you fight them with diet and exercise.
Performers have to glam up with hair-dos and make-up but apart from that you are a real woman. And real women can be slender, curvacious, athletic ,petite etc etc.
What I loath is this desire to look like obviously not quite real "celebratties". Be yourself.
And the time to go under the knife is when a surgeon is saving your life or easing your chronic pain. I've gone under the knife a few times and I've got friends awaiting feet and hip ops and we all wonder why on earth you would have unnecessary surgery.:think: Sadly those who make cash from it and the pandering media are trying to make it seem normal!
 

Shanazel

Moderator
LizaJ and I don't see quite eye to eye on this, so I'll offer the other point of view.

Who decides what is disfigurement? Does psychic pain count for as much as physical pain? I've had breast reduction surgery and when I had a hysterectomy, I also had a tummy tuck. Those two plastic surgeries made more positive difference in my life than any amount of diet and exercise and I'd do either again in a heartbeat. LizaJ, dear, you and your friends who wonder why anyone would have "unnecessary surgery" should bless your stars that you can't understand and be a little less condemnatory of those who choose the surgeries. The truth doesn't always float on the surface for everyone to see.
 

Aniseteph

New member
One person's unnecessary surgery is another's positive life-enhancing choice.

But I think a lot of it these days is deeply unhealthy and more about pandering to and exploiting people's insecurities. Why do some women feel the need to be stick thin with unfeasible boobs? There's something in there that reminds me of the not-quite-convincing "it's so empowering" argument that you hear from young women going involved in the sex industry.

I'm not keen on the phrase 'real women'. It's nonsensical; any woman in existence is a 'real' woman. No woman can be called more or less real than another because of weight or appearance.

I agree that the person underneath is real, but IMO some are trying to project a less real image.
 

Greek Bonfire

Well-known member
All shapes and sizes are fit to dance. The only thing I ask is that a dancer, no matter what size she is, wears costumes that FIT.
 

HubicRuzz

New member
For the most part I was able to keep up with their choreography, although teacher had to clarify some moves for me. As shallow as it sounds, I just felt awful being there and looking like I do. I am losing weight, but am 40 lbs away from my goal.

Well good for you for trying to lose weight. Having met a lot of people who have transformed their lives inside and out after completing things like the transformation competitions, your story is very familiar.

Check out this website for some inspiring stories

Transformation - Welcome

Even though I think the teacher and students in class B didn't think any less of you, you can use this experience as motivation.

Think about how you don't want to feel bad about yourself being in this class. Also think about how good you will feel being in the best condition of your life in a brand new costume when you have reached your weight goals.
 

Elvira

New member
If you don't feel comfortable in class B, then maybe you should consider to go to another instructor or class.

It's no use if you're in an advanced class but you can't enjoy dancing because you're worried abotu what others may think of you.
 

da Sage

New member
LizaJ and I don't see quite eye to eye on this, so I'll offer the other point of view.

Who decides what is disfigurement? Does psychic pain count for as much as physical pain? I've had breast reduction surgery and when I had a hysterectomy, I also had a tummy tuck. Those two plastic surgeries made more positive difference in my life than any amount of diet and exercise and I'd do either again in a heartbeat. LizaJ, dear, you and your friends who wonder why anyone would have "unnecessary surgery" should bless your stars that you can't understand and be a little less condemnatory of those who choose the surgeries. The truth doesn't always float on the surface for everyone to see.

Tried to rep you and couldn't.

My only issue when plastic surgery is when it's a kid. I'm not big on under-18-year-olds getting their noses or boobs done...even with parental permission, but I'm an old fogey. I'd rather see a no-plastic-surgery-under-21 law than the USA's no-drinking-under-21-law.

An acquaintance of mine had a face implant, and even she was going on about "it's not like I'm doing breast implants to be more sexy or something like that." As if "sexy" were the only reason for breast implants! And as if her "fixing" her face was any different than someone else "fixing" a part of their torso that bothered them.:mad:
 

lizaj

New member
LizaJ and I don't see quite eye to eye on this, so I'll offer the other point of view.

Who decides what is disfigurement? Does psychic pain count for as much as physical pain? I've had breast reduction surgery and when I had a hysterectomy, I also had a tummy tuck. Those two plastic surgeries made more positive difference in my life than any amount of diet and exercise and I'd do either again in a heartbeat. LizaJ, dear, you and your friends who wonder why anyone would have "unnecessary surgery" should bless your stars that you can't understand and be a little less condemnatory of those who choose the surgeries. The truth doesn't always float on the surface for everyone to see.

Well of course, doctors do. I am not talking about people who are truly psychologically affected by their body but by the mind set created for many young people that surgery is as normal as popping down to Boots to buy a mascara.
Should I have been left disfigured by childbirth for eg, I'd have had a tummy tuck,had a large breasts that were causing back ache have a reduction, were my eye-lid droop worse than it is and imparing my vision I'd have that done.
Surgery carries dangers to be considered for an 18 year old getting GGs or even botox and that's happening!My opinion is not prompted by the fact I myself look reasonable young for my age but by surveys done recently that young women are taken in by money-making clincs publicity and the exapmle of "celebratties" into thinking surgery is desirable,always safe,normal part of their passage through life.
I think you'll note I talk about comfort and well-being being a reason for surgery but it's not about that for the girl who wants to have men slathering over her abnormal boobs or slug-like lips. Frankly I would make it illegal for surgeons to make money that way when I have paid for their training to ensure the health of this nation not pander to stange misjudged vanities.
I have friends and family who have had surgery. One was what he saw as disfigurement, something that he had spent a childhood being mocked for,a friend in the beauty business who had a small eye-lift. These I understand. Not what I am talking about.
 

Shanazel

Moderator
Gotcha, honey. ;) I don't, however, think doctors are any more capable of judging disfigurement than anyone else. They're just people with their own ideas of how other people should look and behave.
 

Greek Bonfire

Well-known member
I think that if you want plastic surgery, you should do it. It's a personal issue. But the most important thing is why. If you think it's going to change your life, most likely it won't. You have to be happy with yourself first, and then have reasonable expectations.

I had an accident a few years ago that left me with a bump on my lip because it got pretty injured (no need for gory details). The scar tissue was heavy and it bothered me but I also wanted my old lip back. So I got it restored. Also, my teeth were cracking, and if I didn't get veneers they would've eventually fallen out! I guess what I'm saying is that I got back what I lost. Same thing with people who get nose jobs - most of them just want a reasonable looking nose (in their opinion) and once they get it, they are perfectly satisfied. That's what I mean about reasonable expectations.
 

lizaj

New member
I think that if you want plastic surgery, you should do it. It's a personal issue. But the most important thing is why. If you think it's going to change your life, most likely it won't. You have to be happy with yourself first, and then have reasonable expectations.

I had an accident a few years ago that left me with a bump on my lip because it got pretty injured (no need for gory details). The scar tissue was heavy and it bothered me but I also wanted my old lip back. So I got it restored. Also, my teeth were cracking, and if I didn't get veneers they would've eventually fallen out! I guess what I'm saying is that I got back what I lost. Same thing with people who get nose jobs - most of them just want a reasonable looking nose (in their opinion) and once they get it, they are perfectly satisfied. That's what I mean about reasonable expectations.

What you had done is what surgeons trained for not for giving the likes of Jordan/Katie Price her required size of boobs or lips.
 
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