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  1. #1
    Senior Member LadyLoba's Avatar
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    Default New here, just starting belly dance

    Hello...I'm new to both this site and belly dance. Im 35, single, straight, no kids, one cat, work as a writer for a small social services organization. Other than belly dance I am interested in language arts, criminology, sociology, and politics and religion (to discuss and compare not argue), history, and theatre.

    I think I'm going to go for Tribal/Fusion style but I don't know enough about belly dance yet to determine what I like best.

    I am a huge Shakira fan...also like Amira from Las Vegas from what I've seen.

  2. #2
    Moderator Farasha Hanem's Avatar
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    Hello, LadyLoba, and welcome to the forum.

  3. #3
    V.I.P. Greek Bonfire's Avatar
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    Welcome to the world of bellydance. There are so many dancers to see and discover as well as many styles - it is mind boggling!

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Mosaic's Avatar
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    To the forum, enjoy your journey into the world of bellydance
    ~Mosaic
    Dance is like glitter, it not only colours your life, it makes you sparkle, you find it everywhere and in everything and it's near impossible to get rid of. (unknown)


  5. #5
    Super Moderator gisela's Avatar
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    Welcome!

  6. #6
    Senior Member LadyLoba's Avatar
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    Default Thanks guys!

    I forgot I had an account here! I have one at another belly dance site, and I was posting there a lot...but in one post, I used a word that means nothing bad at all in the US...but means a very bad thing in the UK...and instead of just saying "Hey did you know that word means this?" and giving me a chance to say "I am so sorry. I had no idea and meant no offense" and edit it...some people started basically lecturing me and "online yelling" at me over it! And then when I took offense at being yelled at, they started in on me more. It got to the point where little "digs" and admonishments were inserted in other threads...to the point that I was afraid to read anything anyone responded to me out of fear that it would be something else mean. I tried shifting the subject and joking around...at my own expense...they kept at me. I tried just bringing up a new topic....more harassment. I tried opening up to people...just gave them more fuel....when it got to the point that I was literally begging people to stop....I decided to come find another place to connect with others who are in to belly dance...

    I just hope I'm not a complete pest....my level is VERY beginner...and I'm not exactly a graceful swan by nature....so anyone who will answer me might get treated to a round of "I STILL can't do this!" If I get annoying, or I want so much info that it becomes "teaching" and I owe you money...please...let me know

  7. #7
    V.I.P. Greek Bonfire's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LadyLoba View Post
    I forgot I had an account here! I have one at another belly dance site, and I was posting there a lot...but in one post, I used a word that means nothing bad at all in the US...but means a very bad thing in the UK...and instead of just saying "Hey did you know that word means this?" and giving me a chance to say "I am so sorry. I had no idea and meant no offense" and edit it...some people started basically lecturing me and "online yelling" at me over it! And then when I took offense at being yelled at, they started in on me more. It got to the point where little "digs" and admonishments were inserted in other threads...to the point that I was afraid to read anything anyone responded to me out of fear that it would be something else mean. I tried shifting the subject and joking around...at my own expense...they kept at me. I tried just bringing up a new topic....more harassment. I tried opening up to people...just gave them more fuel....when it got to the point that I was literally begging people to stop....I decided to come find another place to connect with others who are in to belly dance...

    I just hope I'm not a complete pest....my level is VERY beginner...and I'm not exactly a graceful swan by nature....so anyone who will answer me might get treated to a round of "I STILL can't do this!" If I get annoying, or I want so much info that it becomes "teaching" and I owe you money...please...let me know
    I know which forum you are talking about. There are a lot of blood baths over there, which is why I no longer am on there. And there is no supervision either, unlike here. And I was almost an Ultimate Bhuzzer! But I just quit. Nowadays I just lurk. Life is too short.

  8. #8
    Senior Member LadyLoba's Avatar
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    I'm sorry to hear it sounds like you got some of that too....yeah...at first I blamed myself and beat myself up over it, but then I realized that it was just the overall tone and mood of the site, and had little to nothing to do with me. To be fair...there are a LOT of really nice women on that site...it was just that they were letting about 10 people out of the hundreds basically "follow" me around and treat me cruelly...when I did nothing but ask not to be spoken to like a child. (and for the record, I did apologize for the word that is unoffensive in my culture but offensive in theirs...as I would have avoided it altogether had I known).

    I do have to amend the "I hate to be spoken to like a child" statement here though....when it comes to belly dance terms/styles/ moves....I will not be offended at all....I have a background in Theatre, but Dance is 100% new to me....I took a few lessons here and there in other forms as a child...that's it...so all the experts on here...you might need to explain things to me like you would to a little kid...otherwise I might not follow!

  9. #9
    V.I.P. Greek Bonfire's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LadyLoba View Post
    I'm sorry to hear it sounds like you got some of that too....yeah...at first I blamed myself and beat myself up over it, but then I realized that it was just the overall tone and mood of the site, and had little to nothing to do with me. To be fair...there are a LOT of really nice women on that site...it was just that they were letting about 10 people out of the hundreds basically "follow" me around and treat me cruelly...when I did nothing but ask not to be spoken to like a child. (and for the record, I did apologize for the word that is unoffensive in my culture but offensive in theirs...as I would have avoided it altogether had I known).

    I do have to amend the "I hate to be spoken to like a child" statement here though....when it comes to belly dance terms/styles/ moves....I will not be offended at all....I have a background in Theatre, but Dance is 100% new to me....I took a few lessons here and there in other forms as a child...that's it...so all the experts on here...you might need to explain things to me like you would to a little kid...otherwise I might not follow!
    Yes, most of them are pretty nice. But you don't always have to agree, yet the bashing I see sometimes over there is not to my liking. I don't agree with everything everybody says here either, but when I am corrected by others who have more knowledge, that is the end of it, and then we move on. I'll take my lumps but only when I deserve them, but to keep beating a dead horse is sick.

  10. #10
    Senior Member LadyLoba's Avatar
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    That's how I am too...if the correction or the response is reasonable and offered in a respectful tone....I welcome it...it is the disrespectful tones and phrasing and the constant going at someone that I don't like. I'm new here, but in reading I only saw it once...and the person got banned for that behavior.

    It's not unique to belly dance forums or chats though....I've been in chat rooms for health issues only to find 50 people logged in, and only the ten most unpleasant individuals actually talking....

    though it will be a LOOOOONNG time before I'll be any help when it comes to bellydance...well, maybe asking questions every other new dancer was too embarrassed to ask

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