Appropriate business cards/posters

[Bellydance Oz]

One of my friends recently got her first gig and she is fired up to get more work. I think it's great she's so enthusiastic, but I was shocked at the photos she had done for her business cards and posters - showing a LOT of skin.

I've heard even modestly-clad belly dancers get weird callers, so I feel she's asking for trouble presenting herself as a red-hot momma.

I'm not a performer myself (except at school haflas!), so I haven't experienced harassment first-hand. Am I being overly worried?

 

[Shanazel]

I got my share of weird calls and there were no pictures at all on my business cards.

I'm tempted to say, "If it ain't for sale, don't advertise it" but one person's "lot of skin" is another person's "modest coverage."

 

[Bellydance Oz]

I'm tempted to say, "If it ain't for sale, don't advertise it" but one person's "lot of skin" is another person's "modest coverage."

To be more specific - in one photo, she's lying on her tummy on the grass facing the camera, up on her elbows so you can see straight down her cleavage. She has her body angled so you can see her legs, which are revealed by the high slit in her costume.

 

[Shanazel]

Well, to each her own, honey. Sometimes we just have to smile and comment on the beautiful colors in the picture and ignore everything else.

 

[LadyLoba]

Since they're already printed...it seems like a "wait and see" thing. If she really loves her picture, and most of the responses she gets are the type she wants....then it would probably just cause hurt feelings to say anything. But if she gets nothing but weird calls...then you might want to gently suggest a different pose....

 

[Bellydance Oz]

Well, to each her own, honey. Sometimes we just have to smile and comment on the beautiful colors in the picture and ignore everything else.

I know what you mean! The thing is, this girl strikes me as quite naive and I'd just hate her to get booked for a stag party and find out the hard way that the pictures were inappropriate!

 

[LadyLoba]

Ooooh yeah...my mind didn't even go there. I know there are a lot of differing opinions among those in belly dance on several levels as to where the line should be drawn as to...for lack of a better word "sexiness."...as well as just plain old individual comfort levels in specific situations.

But just on safety alone...if this person is a bit naiive that could be a problem in and of itself. She just might get herself into situations she never thought could happen and doesn't know what to do in once she gets there.

I know if it were me...well, unless someone wants to pay me money to do the 12 very basic moves I can do and watch me attempt chest circles...I'm not going to be getting any paid belly dancing performances anytime soon....but if say...we were talking about doing a fiction reading...or someone were asking me to sing or act.....I would say...tell her to make absolutely sure she knows as much as possible about any environment she agrees to perform in....and if at all possible....make sure she knows at least one person who is going to be there or takes someone else along.

I agree with everyone else who posted....it is her money she spent on the pictures and the cards....and her wasted time if she winds up spending business hours clearing up misconceptions....but when it becomes a safety issue for the person...that is different. Whoever she is, she's sure lucky to have a friend who cares enough about her to be so concerned. I've had "friends" who would leave me in a dark alley alone because some guy made them feel pretty and offered to buy them a drink they hadn't tried yet!

 

[Nejmeh]

Well, I am dutch so pretty blunt and upfront but I would speak with her about it.
I do agree that to each its own and if she has a good tongue she should be able to make the 'other callers' wish they never even tought of calling. But you say she is a bit naive, she could just not realize it. I would probably make a comment like 'wow, thats a pretty darn sexy picture, beautifull BUT sexy' and see how she reacts. If she is shocked, she didn`t know and you did her a service, if she knows they are sexy pictures you could ask why she choose these. Just ask it as if you were asking about why the photogarpher used lense a instead of lense b.

 

[Aniseteph]

Another thought about sexy promo materials - she might want to think about who her target market is.

Apart from the issues with attracting the wrong sort of jobs, an overly sexy picture might actively put off the right sort. I'm just guessing here, but suspect a lot of the time it is women who are hiring the belly dancer for Uncle Fred's birthday, or for the wedding, or for a demo/workshop at the cultural dance day or whatever. There's a fine line between elegant looking-the-part and looking like someone who might sleaze up your event.

(not saying her pics are like this - just talking in general.)

 

[goddessyasaman]

This is more up to her, each woman has to make up her own mind on what way she dresses, I have always dressed what I'm sure some would call revealing, but to me it is not, as a Belly dancer my clevage is showing most of the time yet my Belly is covered most of the time, to some people the Belly is more revealing (Yet I'm ok with it all) so to each it's own. There are people out there that will think a Belly dancer is a Stripper but yet we are not, It's just the way you must carry youself rather you are dressed revealing or not Let them know who you are and what you are about, in the Belly dance business you must always look at what kind of place you are dancing for.

 

[da Sage]

One of my friends recently got her first gig and she is fired up to get more work. I think it's great she's so enthusiastic, but I was shocked at the photos she had done for her business cards and posters - showing a LOT of skin.

I've heard even modestly-clad belly dancers get weird callers, so I feel she's asking for trouble presenting herself as a red-hot momma.

I think every professional dancer gets harassed eventually, no matter how tame their promo materials are. Maybe your friend's tastes will change in the future? But having sexy (but SFW) photos taken while you are young and have a hot body is a GREAT decision, in my book.

 

[Bellydance Oz]

I'm just guessing here, but suspect a lot of the time it is women who are hiring the belly dancer for Uncle Fred's birthday, or for the wedding, or for a demo/workshop at the cultural dance day or whatever. There's a fine line between elegant looking-the-part and looking like someone who might sleaze up your event.

That's a good point, I may use it!

 

[Bellydance Oz]

This is more up to her, each woman has to make up her own mind on what way she dresses... It's just the way you must carry youself rather you are dressed revealing or not

Yasaman, this girl favours Dina-style costumes but that's not the issue - it's the way she's taken the photo.

The dress has a high split already,but because she's lying down she's been able to pull it all the way open to reveal her whole legs, and she's leaning forward (which in a Dina bra you can imagine...). It's definitely a sexually provocative pose. I would have no problem with the brief costume if she was posing in a more elegant fashion!

 

[Belly Love]

Since they're already printed...it seems like a "wait and see" thing. If she really loves her picture, and most of the responses she gets are the type she wants....then it would probably just cause hurt feelings to say anything. But if she gets nothing but weird calls...then you might want to gently suggest a different pose....

I agree.

Unless she asks for your honest opinion, just let it go. I know your tempted to say something because you care about your friend and don't want her to get hurt, but it may 'cause issues in your friendship if she can't handle your opinion.

 

[Samira_dncr]

Unless she asks for your honest opinion, just let it go. I know your tempted to say something because you care about your friend and don't want her to get hurt, but it may 'cause issues in your friendship if she can't handle your opinion.

I agree with this.

 

[Amulya]

I agree too, it is too sensitive a topic to bring up. I think your friend will find out herself eventually.

 

[LadyLoba]

How is this friend doing with her business?

I hope well. I went for the "don't say anything unless the pictures make things go horribly" option because if you say something right off and then she gets no weird results from them, you just sound mean...and she probably really loves that picture if she put it on her cards...

 

[Corylus]

this girl strikes me as quite naive and I'd just hate her to get booked for a stag party and find out the hard way that the pictures were inappropriate!

In my opinion, she's very naive if she even takes a booking for a stag party!

I agree with other posters, if she asks for your opinion on the business cards or starts getting trouble calls because of it then let her know how you feel but she obviously liked the picture enough to use it on the cards so it could upset her if you tell her you don't like them.

Otherwise, just keep being a good friend and show her support for her new venture into performing

 

[Shara]

I would be blunt, but make it funny....."Whooooo! Hot! Hot! Hot! Whatcha sellin' here, Mamma?" Seriously, cards are important. 2 things: sex (Boobs) sell......BUT it has to be presented in an elegant way that won't piss off anyone's girlfriend or wife!!!! (I hope it's okay to say "pissed off" here! If not, I sincerely apologize!!!!!)