A womans worst enemy

Jane

New member
Now the problem that we have world wide and throughout history, is societal programming, this notion that came from where (?) that each of the genders are to do or be what in other people's eyes, something which quite often goes against the personal grain, why I ask, why are we expected to Kowtow to some unwritten rules to exist.

Most societal programming is a benefit to society. It keeps us from abusing each other. When it does the opposite, it needs to be eliminated. Societal programming is just peer pressure on a large scale and it can be used for good or bad. Some unwritten rules are a good thing :)
 

Greek Bonfire

Well-known member
Maybe a woman's worst enemy is herself? People themselves are often the ones who put them down the worst...

Sometimes this is the crux of the matter, both with men and women, who do not have good feelings about themselves and don't deal with this issue. Instead, they pull others down to their level so that they don't have to rise above their own situation, either through laziness, fear, ignorance or all of the above. They are to be pitied, but also, they are to be dealt with so that they do not pull us down with them.
 

Farasha Hanem

New member
Sometimes this is the crux of the matter, both with men and women, who do not have good feelings about themselves and don't deal with this issue. Instead, they pull others down to their level so that they don't have to rise above their own situation, either through laziness, fear, ignorance or all of the above. They are to be pitied, but also, they are to be dealt with so that they do not pull us down with them.

Well, where I was coming from, I've been beating myself up for having been too hard on someone else. :( I'm finally seeing this person in a different light, and now have a major change of heart. My grandmother's words have been coming back to me: "Everyone deserves a second chance." I only hope this person feels that way about me.

Sorry, guess I'm getting off-topic.
 

Amulya

Moderator
Sometimes this is the crux of the matter, both with men and women, who do not have good feelings about themselves and don't deal with this issue. Instead, they pull others down to their level so that they don't have to rise above their own situation, either through laziness, fear, ignorance or all of the above. They are to be pitied, but also, they are to be dealt with so that they do not pull us down with them.

Not only that, but it seems this society is pushing people to be negative about themselves. Specially women are always complaining about weight, looks, whatever and if you don't you are an odd one.
 

Shanazel

Moderator
In my middle age I decided to embrace oddity with both arms and quit complaining about my appearance. I'd like to claim this as my own personal revelation but I actually picked it up from my daughter when she was ten or eleven. Apparently some of the other fifth grade girls were indulging in angst about their figures or lack of the same. My daughter told me about it when she came home and I asked her opinion of the subject. She said very firmly, "My friends love me, the guys like me, and I think I'm perfect."

I like to think I did something right with this one. ;)
 

Greek Bonfire

Well-known member
In my middle age I decided to embrace oddity with both arms and quit complaining about my appearance. I'd like to claim this as my own personal revelation but I actually picked it up from my daughter when she was ten or eleven. Apparently some of the other fifth grade girls were indulging in angst about their figures or lack of the same. My daughter told me about it when she came home and I asked her opinion of the subject. She said very firmly, "My friends love me, the guys like me, and I think I'm perfect."

I like to think I did something right with this one. ;)

Yeah, I think so, Shanazel. :clap: It takes many people a lifetime to come to this conclusion.
 

Erik

New member
It was on the Shira.net tribe. The dancer who started the thread was the victim, and as I recall the other dancers sided with her and agreed it was wrong to do that. Sorry, Rania, I wish I could remember more.
 

Rania

New member
It was on the Shira.net tribe. The dancer who started the thread was the victim, and as I recall the other dancers sided with her and agreed it was wrong to do that. Sorry, Rania, I wish I could remember more.

There was an incident like that in my town. One belly dancer opened a studio, on the same street as the other belly dancer, and set her prices lower.

Nothing wrong with opening in the same town or county, but the same street, its wrong, I know why they would be upset.
 
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Greek Bonfire

Well-known member
There was an incident like that in my town. One belly dancer opened a studio, on the same street as the other belly dancer, and set her prices lower.

Nothing wrong with opening in the same town or county, but the same street, its wrong, I know why they would be upset.

That is just plain evil - and totally b*tchy.
 

Rp1983

New member
What I think is sad when is when a woman's worst enemy is her mom. Someone mentioned personality disorders earlier, and moms with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder are toughies. Having such a mom can pave the way of not trusting other woman or attracting the wrong type of female friends.
 

Rania

New member
Well I like this dancer, to. Maybe its just what she found. I would like to think that, it was all she could afford. Not that she did it to steal from another dancer. The place where the orginal dancer is not a belly dance studio she just teaches out of its a building with other classes. The other girl opened a studio. its in the back of a building in the basment leval, it does not heat very easily and probably is one of the most affordable outlets. How many times do you see gas stations open by other gas station thetres by thetres, drug stores by drugstores, etc etc. Thats buisness. As far as the price, the orginal teacher on that street has a lot more expirence, then the other. Yes both are good dancers, but the years of expirence are quite differnt 35 vs 6 years. Maybe, thats why shes more expensive. I hate to judge when I don't have all my facts or know the whole situation.

BTW it is NOT Sherena my most recent teacher that did that or is even involved in that street.
 
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Rania

New member
What I think is sad when is when a woman's worst enemy is her mom. Someone mentioned personality disorders earlier, and moms with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder are toughies. Having such a mom can pave the way of not trusting other woman or attracting the wrong type of female friends.

Im close to my mom. But at times we fight ALLOT. And she does things that embarrass me.
 
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