Reinventing This Old Dog

[vickivicki]

Hi,
I'm pretty old, nearly 60, and the last few years have been a nightmare,[long story, or rather,stories] and, to an extent, I am emerging from it. As part of the process, I NEED to reinvent myself. I have been learning and doing different things I dreamed of, way back when I was a child.

One thing I have decided to do, is learn belly-dancing. I ordered a few dvd's, and though of course I will never be professional, I'm enjoying myself, and it is helping to put back together my shattered self esteem.

Though this is a board comprised of many professional, or good, or at least the potential to be good, dancers, I was hoping that I would be welcomed.

Thank You

Victoria

 

[Amanda (was Aziyade)]

Welcome to the forum!!

Now get thee to a live class, woman!! LOL You'll probably find a lot of people in situations similar to yours. I think my entire beginning class last term was reinventing themselves. It's a good, exciting thing to do

 

[Greek Bonfire]

Welcome! So glad you are getting on with your life. I know you are going to enjoy bellydancing for a very long time, as most of us have been doing.

 

[Creaky Old Dancer]

Reinventing this Old Dog

Hi Victoria, Just turned 60 it's not so scary...actually not different than 59. Dancing is great and I remember one teacher saying that when you are an older dancer you can put more meaning in a simple gesture than a younger woman can. Welcome to the site. Oh and whinning about being old is fun especially when you don't mean it and can say such cool things as "Back in the last century when I was young." or "I have shoes older than you ." :dance: Creaks

 

[vickivicki]

Thank you for the welcome! Right now I am learning the basic steps, along with my granddaughter and her friends, through a couple of DVD's[ Bellydance For Wimps, and one by Neena and Veena] Eventually I would like to get into a class, but there are transportation issues at this point.

I have read so many of your posts and they are so inspirational. I am hopeful that now, at this stage in my life, I can finally live as my authentic self.

victoria

 

[Shanazel]

To quote my husband who had his 62nd birthday last Saturday: "The real question is not 'what do I want to be when I grow up' but rather 'what do I want to be next'." I married a very smart man thirty years ago.

 

[Mosaic]

to the forum from another "older but wiser" (wiser than I was in my 20s:lol woman. I took my first lesson at 55 and still going strong7 years later. It was love at first hip-drop and that love continues to grow. I am so addicted that if I don't attend at least one class a week I have serious withdrawals. I began teaching last year and attend 2 to 3 classes a week, with 2 different teachers and spend as much time as possible immersed in the dance, via practice, on this forum, reading, internet, friends, costumes etc as well, I haven't had this much fun since I was a small child Actually I run out of hours, days and weeks all the time - My husband & son don't even notice anymore if I suddenly jump up during a meal/watching TV or whatever and put together a few layering movements ( it has all become totally normal & everyday)- such instantaneous ideas/thoughts come with the addiction. Hopefully you will be able to get to at least one class a week eventually. Enjoy the journey!
~Mosaic

PS: You are not old until you flop into the armchair, give up and stop dreaming You've just got a lot of life under your (hip) belt. People can be old at 30 you know, just take a look around you.

 

[LadyLoba]

I don't think the OP is old at ALL...(and I'm only 36)

I too have known "old" and "young" people of different ages. One of the "oldest" people I ever met was only 17 and 18 years old...and one of the "youngest" was about 66 or 67 when I met her.

as for reinventing yourself and using dance for healing....I'm doing the same thing...and it's great.

And don't worry, you are NOT the only one who is not a professional or near professional dancer on here. I studied belly dance for two months. and am just getting back into it now after a break of two months. I'm at the very beginning of the intermediate level at best and that's only because I used to study and practice for more than an hour every single day when most classes are for an hour a week.

This means I'm almost good enough to perform for my friends without all the clapping having to be out of politeness, but not even CLOSE to being good enough to dance in front of a general audience..

 

[vickivicki]

I would liketo share something about myself. I have high functioning autism. There is a significant ammount of controversy as to whether or not Aspergers and high functioning autism are the same thing. I, personally, do not believe they are, regardless of the opinion of the 'experts".

I was mute until I was 7 years old, and considered moderately mentally retarded. I have HUGE anxiety issues when speaking to other people, and to a lesser degree, even while posting online, which causes me to have difficulty choosing the "correct" words, phrasing, etc.

Ironically, I am a fiction writer. In order to write though, I have a ritual I go through that enables me [ussually] to "fold into myself," [ I can't think of a better way to explain it, which.. I know..sure doesn't sound like a writer] and enter a world which is much less frightening, and, where, hey, I can write.

Anyway, it was while I was writing that a character "popped up", one I found incredibly intriguing. "She" is the original inspiration for my desire to learn to belly dance. And you ladies, you will be my ongoing inspiration. Thank you so much.

Victoria

 

[Nailah_Siti]

Vicki, what an inspirational story! I am pretty new at this also, about 6 months in. I think I'm intermediate but in my opinion I'm not good enough until I'm performing solo and get a standing ovation. Haha I am one of those "older" young'ns... In high school, my nickname was "Mom" and in college, it became "Granny" and "Mawmaw". It really is great that you are able to reinvent yourself, having an alter ego makes it so much easier (in my opinion). I am naturally very outgoing in real-life, but a perfectionist and a smarty-pants. Nailah accepts her body the way it is and expresses every emotion even if it shouldn't be right. Well, anyway, I just want to say that YOU my dear are the inspiration and you have so much to share through dance!

 

[Mosaic]

I would liketo share something about myself. I have high functioning autism. There is a significant ammount of controversy as to whether or not Aspergers and high functioning autism are the same thing. I, personally, do not believe they are, regardless of the opinion of the 'experts".

I was mute until I was 7 years old, and considered moderately mentally retarded. I have HUGE anxiety issues when speaking to other people, and to a lesser degree, even while posting online, which causes me to have difficulty choosing the "correct" words, phrasing, etc.

Ironically, I am a fiction writer. In order to write though, I have a ritual I go through that enables me [ussually] to "fold into myself," [ I can't think of a better way to explain it, which.. I know..sure doesn't sound like a writer] and enter a world which is much less frightening, and, where, hey, I can write.

Anyway, it was while I was writing that a character "popped up", one I found incredibly intriguing. "She" is the original inspiration for my desire to learn to belly dance. And you ladies, you will be my ongoing inspiration. Thank you so much.

Victoria

Victoria, thank you for sharing, and I love the way you put it "fold into myself" - I think it is wonderful you do that and can find that peaceful place that allows you to write. May you continue to be inspired and I'm sure many of us will be inspired by you

PS I love your name Victoria, on my 8th Christmas "Santa" gave me one of the first walky-talky dolls made ( nothing like today's dolls - but I loved her) I named her Victoria Suzzanne, 4 years later my only girl cousin at the time was born and I asked my aunt to call her Victoria Suzzanne (she is known as Tori by her friends but the full Victoria by family) which she did. I still have that doll, she is kept in a glass case for safe keeping as there are few of these left in the world now.
~Mosaic

 

[Shanazel]

I love getting to know our new members! Thank you for sharing, Victoria. Are you familiar with Dr. Temple Grandin? She is a professor of Animal Science at the University of Colorado and also a person with high functioning autism. Quite a lady, that one! Just in case you are interested, here is her web site :

Dr. Temple Grandin's Official Autism Website

 

[walladah]

You know, i also have huge anxiety

and not rarely, severe stress symptoms if i am to speak to people, esp. if they are many, or they are something like an audience, or they are powerful within certain context - and yes, it is difficult to post too in this forum... i must have to tell something, to persuade myself to post... however, it took me some years to realise that people here are very nice and i need not to worry that much!

so, i think that bellydance fits me because i do not need to speak! i just dance! and believe me, people understand much easier through music and movement than through words...

Welcome to the bellydance universe!

 

[vickivicki]

What an incredible group of women you all are. Temple Grandin has done more to advance the understanding of 'creatively wired" people than anyone I can think of.[by the way, Dan Akroyd and Daryl Hannah are both autistic. Bill Gates, though he hasn't publicly acknowledged it, I believe is also] When my son was first diagnosed[my diagnosis followed almost immediately afterwards] I was horrified. Some might say I was in denial, but I don't believe that was the case.

My problem was that, though L.J. and I fit the criteria for autism, the pervading belief AMONG PROFESSIONALS was that those with autism lack empathy and compassion, which could not be further from the truth.

Also, in addition to being autistic, my son has ADHD, Tourettes, and an entire bucketful of co-morbidities[one of them devastatingly tortous] We have been told for YEARS that he will eventually need to be institutionalized. Guess what? It's not going to happen. My son will be happy and successful, by whatever his definition of those things are.

And me? Well, there have been circumstances in the past few years which I have allowed to suck the joy out of me. NO MORE! Why should I be crying in my pillow, when I can , albeit clumsily and awkwardly, dance with the universe.

Victoria

 

[Mosaic]

[Snip]NO MORE! Why should I be crying in my pillow, when I can , albeit clumsily and awkwardly, dance with the universe.

Victoria

WooHoo! What a powerful and beautiful statement Victoria. Now that is a perfect signature line for you:clap::clap:

You sure have had a lot on your 'life' plate, but it seems to me you are a very strong lady and have managed to deal with it, and it doesn't hurt to shed tears when the going gets tough ... it give one time to find the strength & power within. So happy for you that you have found our beautiful dance
~Mosaic

 

[Shanazel]

Why should I be crying in my pillow, when I can , albeit clumsily and awkwardly, dance with the universe.

An apt quote for everyone who is tempted to give up. :clap:

And the longer you dance with the universe, the more graceful that dance will be!

 

[Cyriine]

Welcome Victoria!

I'm also very interested in writing, in fact, the course I've applied to at Uni is focused around that.

Its good that you're doing things you always wanted to and I hope you feel as alive and free as I do when I dance =]