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  1. #31
    Member Sherezade's Avatar
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    Thanks, Daimona!!

  2. #32
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    Default Hi there!

    Well, I'm about my 5th class, and one thing that made me enter to the bellydance is that of breaking my hard thoughts against me. Discover that I'm capable of doing something radically different to those thing I'm comfortable with.

    Every single class one or a hundred thoughts pass through me every second: "you're a stick, you can't dance, you're clumsy". So what? I tell to myself, so what? I'm trying it and I'm sure I'll be better every week.

    Even in my class there is one girl that every time says "oh I'm so darn clumsy" and if you were there, you'll see she's not at all.

    So, let's put those hippo-feelings aside, and show them what you're capable of.


  3. #33
    Premium Member Aniseteph's Avatar
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    I've been dancing for about 8 years and managed to have a hippo class last week. Or maybe a heifer. And I can't even blame learning a new move, it was just one of those hippo days.

    And this week was great. With experience you start to recognise those moments for what they are, steps on a path, or just not being in the zone that day. It's OK - next week you might discover something awesome.

  4. #34
    Super Moderator Mosaic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aniseteph View Post
    I've been dancing for about 8 years and managed to have a hippo class last week. Or maybe a heifer. And I can't even blame learning a new move, it was just one of those hippo days.

    And this week was great. With experience you start to recognise those moments for what they are, steps on a path, or just not being in the zone that day. It's OK - next week you might discover something awesome.
    I had a total clutz/hippo week this week, I am sure I sprouted a couple of extra feet and an extra arm - definitely one of those days where you want to bang your head against the wall, but we just keep on truckin' (dancing) Next week will be better & if not I will just cut those extra limbs free add a couple of head bangs on brick wall, and I'll be right
    ~Mosaic
    Dance is like glitter, it not only colours your life, it makes you sparkle, you find it everywhere and in everything and it's near impossible to get rid of. (unknown)


  5. #35
    Member Sherezade's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uruviel View Post
    Well, I'm about my 5th class, and one thing that made me enter to the bellydance is that of breaking my hard thoughts against me. Discover that I'm capable of doing something radically different to those thing I'm comfortable with.

    Every single class one or a hundred thoughts pass through me every second: "you're a stick, you can't dance, you're clumsy". So what? I tell to myself, so what? I'm trying it and I'm sure I'll be better every week.

    Even in my class there is one girl that every time says "oh I'm so darn clumsy" and if you were there, you'll see she's not at all.

    So, let's put those hippo-feelings aside, and show them what you're capable of.

    Yes, I also started learning bellydance to overcome shyness and improve self-esteem. I guess my hippo-feeling tries to fight that, it's perhaps a trap in my unconscious mind. And perhaps I'll always have hippo-days just as the girls said because I suppose it all depends on our mood as well. Two weeks ago the hippo came back again and I couldn't do anything but I had had a lousy day and it affected my "performance". This week it was better. The secret might be nor fighting the hippo-feeling but make peace with it. I read a psychology book a few years ago and there was a very good example to illustrate what I mean. It was like an inner conversation between the person, the YOU and the negative feelings. Something like:

    Transform the:

    Hippo 'You're some clumsy, you'll never make it. Forget about it.'
    You 'Yes, you're so right. I'm useless and I should give up.'

    In:

    Hippo 'You're some clumsy, you'll never make it. Forget about it.'
    You 'Hey, hey, hey, just relax, ok? Just because I'm not doing this right NOW, that doesn't mean it won't be better next time. Just give me time and stop criticising and I'll make it.'

    Our mind is tricky and the negative feelings are the result of our fear to expose ourselves to something new. Fear works as a protector because it makes you not take certain risks - you know you can die if you do bungee-jumping, so you mind will start telling you NOT to do it and therefore protects you. Surely bellydance won't kill but in our minds it could expose us to embarrassing situations, like doing different movements in a choreography, stepping and falling on the floor, looking silly, whatever.

    Having said this, and though I know I must do my best to deal with the hippo-feeling, I admit sometimes it's not easy. So, I'm just keeping on trying and being kind to myself.

  6. #36
    Member LaVanessa's Avatar
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    I had the hippo feeling last week, I sucked! and tonight I tried my first flamenco class ever - and felt the hippo in full effect. I like to remember Pattabhi Jois' (Ashtanga master) words: practice and all is coming.

  7. #37
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    Sherezade, I understand your frustrations... I myself have not been to a class in a long time, but I am getting back in to it. It is aggravating to learn something new.. However, I promise you, you are doing well.. The fact that you are attempting it, speaks louder than words. Don't be so hard on yourself! Chin up! I think we, as women, are more hard on ourselves than we are of anybody. Be your own best cheerleader! Perhaps what will help is to play some bellydance music at home, and improvise.. I find it more enjoyable, and easier to flow in to different movements if you know how the music flows.. close your eyes and enjoy the movement, the rhythm and how it communicates to your body.. Which instruments talk to your shoulder shimmies? which instruments talk to your hips? If it helps, smile and fake it til you make it in these dance circles.. they aren't formed to be critical, or at least they shouldn't be, They are formed (or should be) to give you an opportunity to express yourself through your dance with what you've learned so far... Don't sweat it! And for every "I can't" tell yourself, "I can" twice as hard..

  8. #38
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    I know what you are going through. Keep going to class and maybe meditate afterwards if that is your thing.

  9. #39
    Member Indigo Shimmer's Avatar
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    Oh do I know the hippo feeling! Anything that has to do with any kind of dance is so "out of my box" for me.

    I'm a tomboy. I ride horses. I restrain mean cats for the vet. I clean up lots of animal messes at work that would make other people faint or barf. I'm fascinated by unusual surgeries.

    I am NOT graceful, attractive or fashion conscious! I am NOT the Imelda Marcos of shoes or purses. I could care less what designer I'm wearing! I prefer jewelry that I make. ( In other words very creative stuff that is very affordable. )

    But here I am standing in a room surrounded by mirrors with a bunch of much younger people trying to....( gasp! )....DANCE!

    Whether I'm with people or by myself, I feel like somebody is sitting on the sidelines, pointing and laughing at me, saying "Look! She's trying to be graceful! Isn't that a hoot!"

    But I'm still there. That's the important part. All the negative stuff? It's me saying it to myself. Nobody else has said these things to me. We're all our own worst critic!

    I'm having trouble figuring out how to shimmy and walk at the same time. But I'm still doing it. When I do the snake arms, all I can see is the "mommy arms". But my rippling fingers aren't all that bad. My belly rolls look more like jelly rolls! But I'm still doing it. And I can do a mean "around the world" with the veil as long as its just in the one direction. And I just learned that!

    Concentrate on what you do well and reward yourself with that when you accomplish what you're having trouble with. And that person that sitting on the sidelines??? Its all a figment of your imagination. They don't exist. Ignore them.

    I saw a bumper sticker the other day. Every time I get discouraged at how I must look, I think of it. "Don't worry about what people think. They don't do it that much!"

    Don't forget to have fun! The fun part is keeping me going.

    Indigo S.

  10. #40
    Member Avariel's Avatar
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    I'm stealing "hippo feeling". I hope you don't mind if I use it from now on

    I just had that feeling myself, actually; I went to Carolena Nerricio's workshops in Portland back in September and while I'm used to being challenged by my own instructors, I'm also used to picking things up quickly. Not so in her workshop; it was sort of a "...holy crap, I have a lot to learn" moment. Don't let it frustrate you! You'll go through phases where you'll feel like all you're doing is struggling, and everything going into your brain is just melting into scrambled egg and you'll never get the hang of it, and it will literally happen overnight; suddenly something you were completely incapable of doing just happens naturally as if you've been doing it all your life.

    I had an art prof in college tell me something, that every good painting I'd ever see has about 50 bad paintings similar or just like it in the artists storage unit. It meant that everything good or done well has a lot of failed attempts, misfires, mistakes, and bad results leading up to it, and all of these things, whether you realize it consciously or not, are teaching you, even if to you it just feels like you're making the same mistakes over and over. And eventually it all falls into place and you're suddenly doing something you didn't think you were capable of. But to get there, you sometimes have to trudge through making a lot of bad paintings.

    So lets make some bad art together, until it's not bad anymore

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