the weight issue... again...

A

Apphia

New member
I'm sure this thread will turn into another broken record, but I had to start one. I'm almost 29. I'm a mother of a 2 year old, and I'm slightly over 200 lbs.. I've floated between a size 18 and 16 (U.S. size gauge) and I'm about 5'5".... I've been heavy the majority of my life... I gained about 40 lbs after I married my wonderful husband, (married almost 10 years now) ... After I had my beautiful son, I had hoped that I could loose more than I had originally weighed, (especially since I nursed him for a year!) but alas, I went back to my original weight... I suffered post-partum depression for quite some time after I had my son... it went unchecked and untreated until recently...

About 6 years ago I studied bellydance under a wonderful teacher, and graduated from beginners to intermediate. I had to stop classes because of career difficulties, and money issues.. I had planned on going back.. but you know how the best laid plans are...

So here I am, way out of shape, lingering on the edge of depression, feeling fat and very unattractive... I need to get into shape, but it is VERY difficult to fit in practice time with a husband, a 2 year old, 2 part time jobs, etc.... I know.. I shouldn't type this as depressing as it's coming out.. I just need advice.. I need encouragement.. I've contacted a local fitness/zumba business to see how much it would cost to just get some private mirror time, but she's emailed me back wondering how much money would I think would be reasonable.. I don't know..

I also have purchased Rachel Brice's Serpentine because I thought the yoga approach would improve my posture and help me get back on the horse, so to speak.. another road block... I don't have time!! I can't seem to squeeze any in at all! What do I do? PLEASE, PLEASE help me get on the right track!
 
Darshiva

Darshiva

Moderator
figure out how much you can afford and offer about that much (maybe a little less) to the gym for the studio time. They may counter with a larger amount, but if you do it right it should cost about what you can afford.

You probably don't have time for scheduled bellydance practice, but you do have housework time and shower time. Some moves can be combined with housework (example: shimmies) to give you the exercise you're after whilst not cutting into your free time too much. Balance it off with a private lesson every once in a while to keep you on track and you'll be set.
 
Greek Bonfire

Greek Bonfire

Well-known member
Also, eat small meals about 4-5 times a day. Take your child for walks. If you can get a bellydance fitness video, Rania has one that has 10, 20 and 30 minute workouts. You can do a few 10 minute workouts a day and get the same results. Every little bit helps.
 
L

Lara

New member
Hey sweetie- welcome back to the dance!
I've dealt with depression off & of for most of my adult life. I have 4 kids ages 2-10 and own a small retail shop- which means it is really easy for me to not have time for myself- something always comes up which 'requires' over time. For me, and a lot of moms I know, it is really easy to always put others first- kids, husband, work, etc. but you end up running on reserves. When you run on reserves all the time, there is nothing left to fall back on when there *is* an emergency or extra stress.

You need to MAKE time for you. You wouldn't blame a car for breaking down if you never take care of it or do the routine regular maintenance, or repair it after damage has been done, so why do we blame ourselves for breaking down under the same circumstances. I recently had a friend who has known for years she suffers from depression, and knows how to cope & control it, but she went in for an official diagnosis simply so she had a piece of paper to show her husband. That's what *HE* psychologically needed to acknowledge that her coping mechanisms weren't just being lazy or not "choosing" to be cheerful, that they were what she *needed* to be able to function at all.

Finances can be trickier- sometimes instructors are willing to make allowances for people who really can't afford regular classes. Is there something you can do in exchange for classes? Keep track of attendance, create flyers, mop the floor, clean the bathrooms, sew recital costumes, be an aide for a kids class- those are all things that folks I know have done in exchange for lessons, or which I have accepted as partial payment. If you have insurance which will cover it, see if your doctor will refer you to a physical therapist to help you figure out what you should be addressing first. I know that sounds like a weird way to start an exercise program, but most of us DO have specific issues we need to deal with when we start any kind of regimen. Doesn't hurt to ask, and post-partum recovery is common reason for seeking physical therapy- your body goes through some serious changes, after all! See if there is somewhere you can go walking, or even a mama's walking group.

I am so hoping you find a way to pursue what you need to to get where you want to be with all this! Hugs!
 
A

Apphia

New member
All of your advice is greatly appreciated... I also forgot to mention that my family moved about 3 years ago, and the closest TRUE bellydance instructor is about a 45 minute drive (highway miles) north of here. So dropping in class after work isn't easy..

I do like the idea of sneaking in practice with other activities, and I'll try to do that. I used to walk with a friend in the evenings, and it was great! Once my husband's evening schedule switches back to days, I'll be able to pick that back up.. we would walk fast for a whole hour.. sometimes getting in as much as 4 miles.

I really appreciate the encouragement. Today seemd a lot better! I really need to get in to see my doctor. We are wanting another child, since our son is nearing 3 years, and it's daunting. I had hoped to be physically fit by now, but it seems like I've back tracked.. If I can get on the right track, maybe birth this time will be easier.

THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!
Any other advice is still appreciated!
Love you all so much! ~Apphia
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top