Offering unsolicited costume advice

LadyLoba

New member
I'm wondering...has anyone ever gently broke it to someone they didnt know that they have a "thought provoking" belly dance costume? I've mentioned this one dancer before...Ill just call her "undies dancer" since I don't think she's professional. But undies dancer regularly posts videos of herself on youtube belly dancing...and she is actually a great belly dancer. She can do an amazing belly flutter and freeze shimmy...two moves I want to do but couldn't right now to save my soul.

But her costumes drag the whole thing down. She belly dances in things like her lingerie bra or her swimsuit with a scarf (not a hip scarf..the kind you wear as an accessory around your neck or tied on to your bag) around her hips...or rolls her tank top up around her rib cage.

I understand that a lot of people dont have the money for nice costumes and not everybody can sew. I am one of those people....I too have to practice in my bra I wear under my clothes. But I dont put it on you tube or wear that and dance in front of anyone.

Ive seen this girl in a pair of black yoga pants...and I seem to remember a black sports bra....I'm wondering if there isnt a way to kindly recommend putting her black sports bra and black yoga pants together as a sort of practice outfit...and wearing that when she posts clips on you tube.

I hate to sound mean...one...I dont know this woman.....it may be a financial thing...I am not exactly the greatest belly dancer who ever shimmied...and she puts little "sets" together with her bras and bikinis and yoga pants and scarves...and always has makeup on...so I can tell she's trying to look good.
 

Shanazel

Moderator
When it comes to directly corrrecting costuming faults of people one doesn't know the best approach is probably MYOB. If one insists on supplying input, Darshiva's suggestion is about the only graceful way to get one's two cents worth in.

I moved these posts to a new thread in order to keep the TPBDC thread neat and orderly.
 
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LadyLoba

New member
Yeah I know...I was just wondering if anyone had done this as the thought did cross my mind. I wasnt planning to actually say anything..Im just afraid it would be too hurtful...and I suppose if she tries to get jobs and doesnt get any...she may figure it out....
 

jjj

New member
I honestly think that's the look she wants to show. A person would wear their regular clothing instead of looking provocative. That's what she's choosing and most likely down the road she will be embarrassed.
 

LadyLoba

New member
That is true..it may well be completely intentional on her part. I think that's one of the reasons you really need an educated eye when you watch belly dance...esp with the ease of posting videos, putting up web pages, and making professional looking business cards and fliers. It is entirely possible to call yourself a "belly dancer"...make all those things I mentioned above...and make them look professional...and not really be taking belly dance that seriously at all.

So I guess you have to kind of look deeper...and ask yourself things like...

Does this person really appear to have genuine skill in this form of dance, or at least appear to be working on it...or are they just jumping up and wiggling around to get people to tell them they look good, and then calling it "belly dancing?"

Does this person appear to be taking a professional approach..finding appropriate music...wearing appropriate costumes...etc...or are they just..again...up there trying to get attention?

I'm also suspicious...as in this case...when every single comment says "ooh you're so beautiful. ooh you're so sexy." and nobody says anything about any other aspect of the dance. It makes me think the person is just taking down anything that comments on aspects of the dance...positive or negative...and just wants their own personal "I need to feel sexy" board.

Like I said on another post...if you think belly dance and belly dancers are sexy...great. I think it's sexy too. But if all a dancer is offering is being sexy...I wouldnt want to hire them as a professional dancer. Look how many women think American football and American football players are sexy (not me, but a lot of women I know)...and those guys still have to play well to get paid to do it. Just dressing out in the uniform and running around so the women think they're sexy doesn't cut it.
 
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