Bellydance Limericks

Duvet

Member
I found a thread of Bellydance poetry from a couple years back, but fancied one devoted solely to limericks. So post your worse rhymes and most clever inventions. I need some funny things to read. :D


A dancer who lost it on stage
Stormed off and flew into a rage
She swore like a gunner;
Threw props at the drummer.
They now keep her locked in a cage!


A performer of Danse Oriental
Decided that props were essential.
But a cane and a fan,
With a lit shamadan,
Just made everyone think she was mental.
 

Shanazel

Moderator
On the old pre-hacked forum we had a thread devoted to BD limericks. If I can find the ones I wrote I'll post them.
 

LilithNoor

New member
An impoverished dancer called Glenna
Took tips in her bra to buy henna
But her act went awry
Upon meeting a guy
Who rummaged for change for a tenner!
 

Duvet

Member
A drummer who sat on the floor
Yelled “I can’t sit still anymore!!”
So he used both his knees
To shimmy with ease,
And shuffled right out of the door!


Morgana, the dancer from Camelot,
Found her memory started to spam a lot.
She forgot the next step
And felt quite inept,
So she carried on smiling and span a lot
 

Yshka

New member
Lol, yours are awesome!! :lol: Ok here's a try:

A lady from downtown Dubai,
once bought Wings of Isis to fly.
She climbed Burj el Arab,
and jumped off the top,
Darn that salesman who told her a lie!

The snake of a dancer called Jack,
one day slithered right down 'round his back
with his arms tightly bound
as the snake wrapped around
he fell right off the stage with a smack!

A shamadan girl from Hawaii,
got to dance for a good-looking guy.
Kneeling down to look cute,
she lit up his suit,
burning everything down to his tie!

And one my troupemates and I came up with years ago during a very amusing car-ride home after a great show:

Our troupe is called El-Fatinat,
we are great entertainment you bet!
We don't dance for free,
but it's worth it, you'll see.
We are something you'll never forget!
 
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Duvet

Member
There once was a dancer for hire
Whose performance, quite frankly, was dire.
His shimmies were dodgy;
His timing was bodgy;
And his posture just filled you with ire!


A student of Hilal's Raq Sharqi
Said "I know that some can get snarky
And say I've no passion.
Well, that just their fashion.
I follow what's in my own heart-y."
 

Yshka

New member
A dancer who worked on a boat,
got caught dancing by dad while afloat.
When the music had ceased,
he did not look pleased,
thus he traded her in for a goat!!

(I know: ouch! LOL, but it was in my head all day and I just HAD to get it out :lol:)
 

Duvet

Member
A cute bellydancer called Sandy,
Discovered that he was quite handy
At teaching large classes.
He took dance to the masses,
And proved he was more than eye-candy


A divine bellydancer once thought
Herself far too good to be taught:
“I was born a Goddess!
I have natural finesse.
Disagree, and I’ll just get distraught!”


Bellydancers have tried to discover
A theory that pleases each other
On the source of their dance.
But they found there’s no chance;
Some dictate, some give up, some don't bother.


A young bellydancer called Shirley
Does veil work that’s ever so swirly.
She twirls on the spot;
Gets tied in a knot;
Then undone by a sailor from Burley.
 

Shanazel

Moderator
A hefty young dancer named Jimmy
Decided to learn how to shimmy
When his girth got to rocking
His knees started knocking...


Ten big smiles to anyone who can finish this. My other rhymes to "Jimmy " are lame but I like the first four lines.
 

Daimona

Moderator
A hefty young dancer named Jimmy
Decided to learn how to shimmy
When his girth got to rocking
His knees started knocking...
He shouted out loud: I'm a McKinney!


A hefty young dancer named Jimmy
Decided to learn how to shimmy
When his girth got to rocking
His knees started knocking...
Scared he ran away, home to Kissimmee.



Shanazel: Lamer than this? And do I get twenty big smiles now? ;)
 

gisela

Super Moderator
I know this is not a correct limerick but bear with me ;) Or come with a suggestion.

While entering on a melfuf
The music suddenly went *poof*
A dum and a tek
and the rest was a wreck
The soundguy did NOT get a check...
 

Duvet

Member
Too early for Hallowe'en, but I'll have forgotten it by then. Maybe the bellydance ghost story thread?;-

A bellydance zombie from Ryde,
Did the hen night for Dracula's Bride.
They were really impressed,
'Til she shimmied her dress.
Then her legs fell off, one on each side!

This bellydance zombie was also
Engaged to manouever her torso
For Dracula's sight
At his Whitby stag night,
Where she gave an incredible floor show.

Now some of you may have the thought;
"How come bellydance has been taught
To the walking undead?",
But may it never be said
That we''re seen as the excluding sort!!
 
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Duvet

Member
A bloke thought that it would be great
To bellydance. He would lose weight,
And have lots of fun
Just shaking his bum,
And teaching his tum to gyrate.

This bloke went along to be taught,
At a bellydance class that he’d bought.
But florets and knee shimmies!
Chest slides and hip thingies!
It’s not so easy as he’d thought!
 

Duvet

Member
A teacher of Zumba biotic
Decided to make it exotic.
She put in some Bhangra,
Raq Sharqi and Samba.
The result? Absolutely chaotic!!
 

Farasha Hanem

New member
A rotund belly dancer named Kimmy
Spontaneously busted out in a shimmy,
But when an earthquake broke out,
She began to have doubts,
And decided not to do things on a whimmy.

Yeah, I know... :rolleyes: :lol:
 
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