Shakti
New member
You may have heard "girl rules" or the male version the "bro code". These sets of "rules" are common knowledge social rules.
The reason I am bringing this up is because of a problem I had with person who was a friend and someone who I had collaborated with on a couple dance projects. Well the more I got to know her, I felt she was just using me to further her own "image/reputation" (since she was new in town) and (behind my back) promoting this to others taking all the credit for our project based on a style that she has no expertise in but is capable to learn the choreo. Our dance community is not really very large. Out of 3 area teachers they maybe have 5 students each. But for area haflas about 20 to 100 people attend as spectators. Only mentioning this because there is no "empire" to be gained. While occasionally there is a paying gig, having your only income from bellydance is not an option locally. It is what I would think of to be a typical bellydance community, people bonding through dance, making friends and having fun. There is no restaurant to dance in, only community events that anyone who wants to perform in can do so. My point being, there is nothing to really to gain by alienating anyone in the community. So, adding up the her actions through a time of a few months I felt the need to back out of our project. I never talked to her after that until 6 months later, when I found out she was emailing and calling my husband.....for a most "innocent" and BS reason. He never responded to her. The reason she gave for doing this was so absurd it defies logic. If she was really honest about her intentions, she was looking for an excuse to irritate and hurt me.
I have told a few close friends and they agree she broke the "girl code".
When she first moved to the area she was asked to leave the other 2 teachers classes because she was talking
to their students promoting her upcoming classes. I found this out while
confiding this info to another area friend and teacher.
I feel odd about telling every waking soul in the community about her contacting my husband, but I really do not want her to be a part of a once happy and peaceful dance community. Has your
dance community ever had experience
with such an toxic individual? How do you deal with it? Another thing that is irritating is the teachers who asked her to leave their classes are so nice to her face, when I see her I just ignore her. Any experience that you wish to share about a bellydance community toxic situation?
The reason I am bringing this up is because of a problem I had with person who was a friend and someone who I had collaborated with on a couple dance projects. Well the more I got to know her, I felt she was just using me to further her own "image/reputation" (since she was new in town) and (behind my back) promoting this to others taking all the credit for our project based on a style that she has no expertise in but is capable to learn the choreo. Our dance community is not really very large. Out of 3 area teachers they maybe have 5 students each. But for area haflas about 20 to 100 people attend as spectators. Only mentioning this because there is no "empire" to be gained. While occasionally there is a paying gig, having your only income from bellydance is not an option locally. It is what I would think of to be a typical bellydance community, people bonding through dance, making friends and having fun. There is no restaurant to dance in, only community events that anyone who wants to perform in can do so. My point being, there is nothing to really to gain by alienating anyone in the community. So, adding up the her actions through a time of a few months I felt the need to back out of our project. I never talked to her after that until 6 months later, when I found out she was emailing and calling my husband.....for a most "innocent" and BS reason. He never responded to her. The reason she gave for doing this was so absurd it defies logic. If she was really honest about her intentions, she was looking for an excuse to irritate and hurt me.
I have told a few close friends and they agree she broke the "girl code".
When she first moved to the area she was asked to leave the other 2 teachers classes because she was talking
to their students promoting her upcoming classes. I found this out while
confiding this info to another area friend and teacher.
I feel odd about telling every waking soul in the community about her contacting my husband, but I really do not want her to be a part of a once happy and peaceful dance community. Has your
dance community ever had experience
with such an toxic individual? How do you deal with it? Another thing that is irritating is the teachers who asked her to leave their classes are so nice to her face, when I see her I just ignore her. Any experience that you wish to share about a bellydance community toxic situation?
Last edited: