Does this upset you?

[beachbunny]

So, I get it. Belly dance usually gets a bad rep and people will say some offensive things. I usually brush it off and explain that it's only sexual if you make it so. But what about when belly dancers themselves have such negative things to say? I feel like it's a million times worst when a belly dancer themselves says that it's shameful. Especially because my best friend is Egyptian and her whole family belly dances, even nieces because it's a cultural thing. They all belly dance together at family parties and its makes me upset when a girls who belly dance say things that someone who knows nothing about belly dance would say. Of course there's ways to make the movements very sexual, but even most of my guy friends find it more boring than sexual.

 

[beachbunny]

Sorry if this subject has been talked about a lot already. x) I've only performed recently and my friends took pictures so I've been getting a lot of comments. And when I try to find other belly dancers who share in the annoyance I end up finding a few who actually agree.

 

[Duvet]

I'm a little confused here. Are your friends saying that you look sexual when you bellydance, or are they saying that bellydance in general is a sexual dance?

But regarding your Egyptian friends. For many Egyptians it is perfectly acceptable to bellydance at family parties, but to bellydance in public, in front of strangers, on stage, is viewed as immoral. The moves might be exactly the same, but the context is totally different. Its understandable if their reaction to your performance has been less than congratulatory

 

[beachbunny]

Oh no my friend likes it, but I mean I've met belly dancers who perform in front of audiences but feel ashamed of it and hide it from the people the know. I just feel like it should be something youre proud of! There's some dancers who say they'd never let someone they know , know that they dance. They way the talk about it it's like were talking about stripping which shocks me since they are dancers who perform plenty of times.

 

[da Sage]

Oh no my friend likes it, but I mean I've met belly dancers who perform in front of audiences but feel ashamed of it and hide it from the people the know. I just feel like it should be something youre proud of! There's some dancers who say they'd never let someone they know , know that they dance. They way the talk about it it's like were talking about stripping which shocks me since they are dancers who perform plenty of times.

Lots of people hide lots of things about themselves. Not because they're ashamed, but because they don't feel like taking the flack from people who are idiots/ignorant/judgmental/just looking for a reason to cause trouble.

Case in point: anyone who is/ever was "in the closet" re: homosexuality/bisexuality to anyone (friends/relatives/coworkers/teammates/neighbors).

 

[beachbunny]

Yeah that makes sense. I'm glad its starting to become more accepted though! I can understand a person wouldnt want to deal with the remarks and comments. I guess I just was in a rant kinda mood.

 

[Stephanie]

A lot of people don't have the education/cultural awareness about belly dancing in the Middle East to know that it's not a dance for strippers or women with loose morals. And these days a lot of people don't have open minds. If they think it's a stripper dance, nothing will convince them otherwise.

 

[beachbunny]

Very true, Stephanie! These days it seems people are very close-minded. I was actually shocked that my grandmother was so open to it, while my cousins not so much. :lol:

 

[Pleasant dancer]

Very true, Stephanie! These days it seems people are very close-minded. I was actually shocked that my grandmother was so open to it, while my cousins not so much. :lol:

Aah, with age comes wisdom!

The reaction I have had from "older" ladies is that they often say "I wish I was younger I could have done that!"

(no offence guys I've never actually had a man say this too me though some may have thought it!)

 

[Duvet]

Aah, with age comes wisdom!

The reaction I have had from "older" ladies is that they often say "I wish I was younger I could have done that!"

(no offence guys I've never actually had a man say this too me though some may have thought it!)

I had a man say the same thing to me, only last month. It was the best comment I could have wished for.