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  1. #1
    Moderator Shanazel's Avatar
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    Default January 25, 1759

    The Queen of England was being shown around an Edinburg hospital by the head doctor. At one point, she is escorted into a ward with a number of patients who show no obvious signs of injury. She goes up to a man sitting alone in a chair and inquires after his health. To her surprise, the man answers,

    Omy Luve's like a red, red rose,
    That's newly sprung in June:
    O my Luve's like the melodie,
    That's sweetly play'd in tune.

    The queen blinks a couple of times and tells the man she hopes
    he'll feel well soon. She shakes off the experience and approaches an older
    woman who is looking out a window. She mentions the lovely day to the patient
    who immediately says,

    Ye banks and braes o' bonie Doon,
    How can ye bloom sae fresh and fair?
    How can ye chant, ye little birds,
    And I sae weary fu' o' care!

    "Um, quite," murmurs the queen and walks to the end of the hall where a good-looking young man is standing next to the exit door. Shesays, "And you, sir, how are you today?" The young man strikes a pose and immediately declaims,

    Scots, wha hae wi' Wallace bled,
    Scots, wham Bruce has aften led,
    Welcome to your gory bed,
    Or to Victorie!

    "Ah, yes," says the queen politely, "Do have a good day."

    As she walked through the ward doors, she murmured to the doctor, "That was the psychiatric ward, was it?"

    "No, ma'am," he answered, "That was the Burns Unit."

    In honor of Robert Burns' 259th birthday
    "Well, now that we have seen each other," said the unicorn " if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you."

  2. #2
    V.I.P. Ariadne's Avatar
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    Default

    That's terrible!

    Well done Shanazel.

  3. #3
    Moderator Shanazel's Avatar
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    This may be my all-time favorite joke. I tell it at least once every January 25.
    "Well, now that we have seen each other," said the unicorn " if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you."

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