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  1. #1
    V.I.P. jenc's Avatar
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    Default Mistaken Identity

    September 2007 I fuond a new teacher who retired to have a baby in the December.

    September 2008, I enquired about privates and got a couple of very fulsome emails about my abities, of the is she really talking about me variety, eg was I thinking of performing or teaching. Then we had one private.

    Well turned out she wasn't actually talking about me, as last week she emailed my friend and asked her to be a founder member of a new troupe. Friend said she must have lost your email, which I thought was odd, but maybe there was some misunderstanding about the privates. so i emailed saying hi if you thought I was so good in September why haven't you asked me.

    My friend got a reply that my technique wasn't good enough.

    So I mailed and said I know that the private didn't go all that well, and I believe there may be some personal misunderstanding between us, but in September you thought I was good.

    The reply I got was that the nice emails were a case of mistaken identity. That when I turned up for the private, she realised her mistake, but didn't want to hurt my feelings.

    "until I change my mindset to improve myself technically I will not progress to performance stage"

    I practice an hour almost every day, so I read this as blaming me for being deluded enough for believing her. (I did not think that she meant performing right away, I wasn't that deluded, and that would be my ultimate aim).

    I alternate between being furious and being terminally embaressed that I told other people what she said.

    So where am I now!

  2. #2
    V.I.P. da Sage's Avatar
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    Hi Jenc,

    I can (sort of) relate. Over the past couple of years, I've been repeatedly mistaken for two other people (who incidentally look nothing alike). One is a much better dancer than I am, and has studied with famous dancers (I'm so jealous!). The other is a good dancer, but the problem is that I have gotten several compliments/comments on a burlesque routine she participated in as part of a variety show. Basically, some people think I allowed my clothes to be removed onstage as part of a burlesque act, and they think I'm lying to their faces when I tell them, "That's the OTHER da Sage (in real life, we share the same first name, and the name was announced as part of the performance), not me!" Their responses: "Riiiight" "Funny, she LOOKED like you", etc.

    But that doesn't make your situation not suck. I bet the teacher is embarrassed about her confusion, and maybe taking it out on you a little bit.

    The only thing you can do is be so awesome that she eventually regrets not asking you to join her project, or at least has to acknowledge to herself that you have the professional-level skills NOW, even if she never admits that you had them before. Sadly, some people just cannot admit that they were wrong.

  3. #3
    Moderator Amulya's Avatar
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    That is awful! I'm so sorry to hear that. That teacher should have been more careful

  4. #4
    V.I.P. Reen.Blom's Avatar
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    Gosh, its embarrasing, although she is to blame.... just sounds she tried to sweet talk you into taking privates with her? Probably sends the same admiring email to everyone... Agree with da Sage, who knows maybe you gonna be a part of a bigger project than hers, and she will regret that she did not invite you!!!

    HUGS

  5. #5
    Super Moderator gisela's Avatar
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    That must be so frustrating! I find it really odd that she didn't correct her mistake as soon as she realised it. Also, how could she give you proper guidance for the private classes based on those faulty e-mails? Sounds like you sought more education to understand your abilities and she confused you even more. Grrrr!
    immer glimmer

  6. #6
    V.I.P. shiradotnet's Avatar
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    There is a dancer in the Los Angeles area who also uses the stage name of "Shira". She was already a professional dancer in the 1980's when I was still a student, and she was one of the dancers who appeared on a video titled "Arabian Dance Fever" that also has Nagwa Fouad on it. Now, 20 years later, people assume that's me on that video. After all, we're both blonde, we're probably not too far apart in age, we both lived in California for many years....

    A couple of years, I received an email from that Shira, introducing herself. It seems that after tons of people had told her that they loved "her" web site she decided to find out just whose web site she was being given credit for, and that's how she discovered Shira.net.

    So, just for the record, I'm not the dancer on Arabian Dance Fever, and the Shira who lives in the Los Angeles area is not the owner of Shira.net. <smile>

  7. #7
    V.I.P. jenc's Avatar
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    What is worse is that now she has mailed me to correct the misunderstanding - there is a clear implication in what she says that I am a delusional old bat who should have known that my dancing wasn't up to that standing.

    I never thought she was saying I could be the next BDSS, I thought she meant dance a solo at a hafla - God knows I've seen some terrible ones so that isn't too high an aspiration!!!!

    I am trying to believe that as I forced her to own up - she has shifted responsibility onto me so as not to have to admit how unprofessional she's been. But my blood still runs cold when I think of what she has said now. I have a long list of improvements to make to my dancing, based on classes that ended 15 months ago and the one private, and nothing positive except my enthusiasm.

    As a matter of fact, I never thought my performance in class was anything but average, based on the way I klutz up when concentrating.

    i thought it had to do with seeing me improv at a nightclub.

    Anyway, I got inspiration to work hard from the nice things she said. I am now going to get more inspiration from the nasty experience.

  8. #8
    V.I.P. Aisha Azar's Avatar
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    Default Shira

    Quote Originally Posted by shiradotnet View Post
    There is a dancer in the Los Angeles area who also uses the stage name of "Shira". She was already a professional dancer in the 1980's when I was still a student, and she was one of the dancers who appeared on a video titled "Arabian Dance Fever" that also has Nagwa Fouad on it. Now, 20 years later, people assume that's me on that video. After all, we're both blonde, we're probably not too far apart in age, we both lived in California for many years....

    A couple of years, I received an email from that Shira, introducing herself. It seems that after tons of people had told her that they loved "her" web site she decided to find out just whose web site she was being given credit for, and that's how she discovered Shira.net.

    So, just for the record, I'm not the dancer on Arabian Dance Fever, and the Shira who lives in the Los Angeles area is not the owner of Shira.net. <smile>


    Dear Shira,
    I remember working in Dr. S. Farag's booth one year at Rakassah with Jeanette Cool, and selling that video. Sami Farag gave me a copy of that one and one of Suhaila's along with my paycheck. I had forgotten all about her, but I guess I never thought of you and her as the same person! I can see where it could happen though I thinl you are taller than her!! She was a sunny little dancer....
    Regards,
    A'isha

  9. #9
    V.I.P. karena's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenc View Post

    Anyway, I got inspiration to work hard from the nice things she said. I am now going to get more inspiration from the nasty experience.

  10. #10
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    Default I don't even know what to say

    Let me try and get this straight...
    She sends you emails telling you how good you are. You have no reason to not believe her. Then she sends your friend emails telling her she didn't mean you?! Very unprofessional to send an email to your friend instead of directly to you regarding the mistake.
    THEN she sends you an email that basically says you're the one that's delusional???
    I'm in the mood to yell at someone as it is. I just found an article of an interview I did regarding a huge research project I've been working on for the past 6 months and just presented to the state government. The stupid guy who wrote the article not only misrepresented me but also misquoted me and got my information wrong. I came off sounding like I didn't even want to be there presenting my own research! He's going to find a new hole on his body somewhere on the backside when I'm through with him. I'll probably still be on a roll when I'm finished with him, so let me know if you need me!

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