I know who I am when I belly dance

Shanazel

Moderator
13. Belly Dancer Tattoo

Have the artist place the tatto on your buttocks ( is that across both!?) and then surprise him during lovemaking. This will be a sight he will always remember.

:lol::lol: I'll say and can you imagine when you go in for that hip replacement;)

Maybe I should go for a tattoo like a guy at the Sturgis Bike Rally displayed: a Harley Davidson shovelhead in full color across both buttocks. Now, that surely would surprise my "sultan" but the evenings activities (shall I say "ballgame" or would that be too naughty?) would be seriously delayed on account of hysterical laughter.
 

Ariadne

Well-known member
why? why ?why? this book be written :rolleyes: and please pass that sick bucket. any one who knows anything knows a husband isn't a sultan when it comes to bellydancers he's your trusty native bearer for the goodies you find at dance fairs and fabric shops.
... and the reality check when you want to spend way to much - again.

After the shopping trip you can be very nice to him by not playing your bd cds in the car and having a nice dinner (either out, take-in, or do it yourself)
So true, so true.
 

Sita

New member
13. Belly Dancer Tattoo

Have the artist place the tatto on your buttocks ( is that across both!?) and then surprise him during lovemaking. This will be a sight he will always remember.

:lol::lol: I'll say and can you imagine when you go in for that hip replacement;)

That's some therapy - takes you places you never wanted to go (I thought that was only psychoanalysts;)). By the way in reference to the cliched bedouin... oh sorry Arabian tent; will an old plastic one do? - I want the place to myself so i'm thinking of seducing my Sultan into sleeping outside. :cool:

Sita
 
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lizaj

New member
11.His Favourite dish
"Cook him his favourite dish.Dance a little belly dance for him then place the food in strategic places all over your body and et him eat away.mak sure the food is not to hot or cold on your skin."

Try that with battered cod,chips and mushy peas or even better with lamb Jafrezi!:lol:
 

Aniseteph

New member
Oh poor chap, it just gets worse, first the belly-dance'd up sex and now she's ruining his favourite dish... :(
 

jenc

New member
I'm planning to get a rude tattoo before I'm put in a home....I know by then i won't know what's going on but I can't bear the thought of being caleed Jenny and patronised.

So does that mean you have to hide all glimpses of your rear end until it stopws looking red from tattoo?
 

Ranya

New member
Ok I just put this book on my Chanuka/Christmass wish-list :D .... I HAVE to have this book, it's so hilarious.
 

mandyt

New member
Ok I just put this book on my Chanuka/Christmass wish-list :D .... I HAVE to have this book, it's so hilarious.

So do

I think Liz needs to do a re-write with comments it would be a bestseller.
I have nearly fallen of my chair laughing.
 

Darshiva

Moderator
why? why ?why? this book be written :rolleyes: and please pass that sick bucket. any one who knows anything knows a husband isn't a sultan when it comes to bellydancers he's your trusty native bearer for the goodies you find at dance fairs and fabric shops. After the shopping trip you can be very nice to him by not playing your bd cds in the car and having a nice dinner (either out, take-in, or do it yourself)

My Hubby is incredibly good about that sort of thing actually. I'll be behaving and not playing the cd in the car, but having read of the cover & liner notes & I'll notice that the case is unusually light.... and then the music starts up & he gives me a grin.

I think I have a keeper. Especially since he winces at the 'husband = sultan' thing as misogynistic.
 

Hypnos

New member
What is with this book? It sounds ludicrous lol!

I don't have a boyfriend or husband but I'm sure my girlfriend would be extra confused if I started calling her "Sultan" and smothering myself in her favourite food which happens to be sweets.

There's an idea! I'll belly dance for her in a bedlah decorated with brightly coloured sweets instead of sequins!
 

Sita

New member
What is with this book? It sounds ludicrous lol!

I don't have a boyfriend or husband but I'm sure my girlfriend would be extra confused if I started calling her "Sultan" and smothering myself in her favourite food which happens to be sweets.

There's an idea! I'll belly dance for her in a bedlah decorated with brightly coloured sweets instead of sequins!

Actually the feminine form is Sultana which should confuse her even more;),but I do like the idea of you trying to use sultanas instead of sequins to keep in theme-it would be healthier. :lol:

Sita
 

lizaj

New member
How could I have missed number 1!
You need: a new but simple bely dance costume. It cn be as simple as a see-through veil wrapped around yourbody....a hip scarf around your hips......write a letter..leave in his mailbox at work....Ask him to meet you at your favourite restaurant. Come dressed in sexy belly dance costume..wear a long coat or sweater so you dont get harassed before he arrives....allow him glimpses of your costume...talk to him as if you have just met him....then tell him you can't wait to go to a hotel room and show him the rest..make sure you have hired a sitter and booked a hotel room."


The good man wept! How to put other people off their dinners:rolleyes:
I keep visualising how him indoors would react..D-I-V-O-R-C-E. He'd have me sectioned!:lol:
 
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Shanazel

Moderator
Since our favorite restaurant is a fifties style hamburger place, the chiffon dripping below my barn jacket might make me look a little overdressed.
 

jenc

New member
reminds me of the book I once read which said that he would be putty in my hands if I shaved off my bush and met him at the door when he got in from work starkers.

I agree with Liz, if he even noticed he would have me sectionned!!
 

lizaj

New member
reminds me of the book I once read which said that he would be putty in my hands if I shaved off my bush and met him at the door when he got in from work starkers.

I agree with Liz, if he even noticed he would have me sectionned!!

Oh there's a suggestion similar to that, Jen:lol:
 

jenc

New member
With my luck, I'd answer the door and it would be the UPS man.

Well if you've been sleeping with the same man for 35 years, that might be the only way someone would notice the difference.

mind you, I once went out with a man for a year and didn't notice he'd shaved off his beard until I worked out why he was acting peculiar
 

Shanazel

Moderator
This is a small town. My UPS man is a skinny little guy about the age of my son. I'd probably scare him into fits and then where would we be? Imagine the sheriff department reports as printed in the paper that week. "UPS Man Brought Down By Middle-aged Woman."
 
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