Bellydance Limericks


I saved that one for my newsletter with a transliteration of ass into arse so it would parse in Aussie English. Hope you don't mind!


Not at all, Darshiva. Glad you liked it. Arse is the correct spelling (unless the teacher was bellydancing on a donkey! :think: Hmm - another limerick?).



A bellydancer in hot Sante Fe
Read a book as she shimmied all day.
But the heat made her faze
As she read Cervantes,
And she fell on her Don Quixote!
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"The Veiled Male"
A hefty young dancer named Jimmy
Decided to learn how to shimmy
When his girth got to rocking
His knees started knocking...

Ten big smiles to anyone who can finish this. My other rhymes to "Jimmy " are lame but I like the first four lines.
He said "I don't think this is too femmy!"


An experienced Bellydance Ninja
Used ‘stealth hips’ to ambush and injure.
And his foes he would pelt
With his lethal coin belt,
Wearing zills on his thumb and first finger.


A young Tribal Dancer named Jaq,
Had tattoos all over her back,
Down her hips, on her chest...;
But as for the rest,
We’d best draw a veil over that!


I danced for the pure love of moving,
But praise made me too self-approving.
I thought I was handsome;
My looks worth a ransom.
My dance needed no more improving!

But then at the height of my pride,
Some pictures of me I espied:
Worn out and demented,
Wild eyed and unkept’d;
My ego just curled up and died.

I resolved on the spot that no more
Would I be on the bellydance floor.
This dance I thought ‘proper’,
Was ridicule fodder.
So I walked away - sad, shamed and sore.


A long and complex dance routine
Can be scary at first, until seen
To be nothing but moves
That practise improves;
And success in the end you will glean.

So when hip drops with spins to the right,
Give you sweats when you wake in the night,
And you quiver with dread
As thoughts in your head
About veils make you really uptight,

Just remember it’s nothing to fear.
In the long term it’s not why you’re here.
Enjoy what you do,
And an error or two,
Makes you human - so lets raise a cheer!


An old belly dancer, for fun,
On her ninetieth birthday, among
All the cards, gifts and cake
Did an epic hip shake,
And dumbfounded her great great grandson.

Embarrassed, he fled from the sight,
And to grandpa appealed “That’s not right!
She mustn't do it again!!”
Grandpa nodded and then
Chest shimmied with all of his might!
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The audience did as I feared
They hollered and booed and they jeered,
I must be a perv,
Confused or disturbed.
A male bellydancer’s just weird!!

But wait! – I’ve got it all wrong!
I misread all that noise from the throng.
Not booing and jeering,
But whooping and cheering.
They’ve wanted my dance all along!!


The forum is dying! Oh My!!
It’s all very quiet here - Why?
No heated debates,
No discussions with mates.
Should we all shed a tear and say ‘bye’?

But don’t be disheartened and down.
Bellydance hasn’t gone underground.
It’s on Facebook and Twitter,
So don’t mope and get bitter,
But enjoy it where ever it’s found.

Yet if you can’t bear all the Twitters,
And Facebook just gives you the jitters,
Make the most of it here.
Post with gusto and cheer!
Keep the sunny side up so it glitters.


There once was a dancer from Spain,
Who performed with a L.E.D cane.
She twirled it with vigour,
Then switched on the trigger,
And BANG!!..She was ne'er seen again.
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Two years and se'en months it has been
Since I last Limericked on this screen,
And posted a ditty
(daft, poignant or witty).
I hope you all like what you've seen.

And though I would still like to write,
I feel that my muse has took flight.
Whilst my scansion is fine
And I know how to rhyme,
I simply just can't get it accurately succinct enough.