I am new to belly dancing (less then a year). I really love it but I have a problem and I was wondering if you ladies can help me. I am a plus size lady and I find it so hard to find any support from the belly dance community. I thought that belly dance was to empower you and make you feel like a woman and to have a place that all women (no matter what size or shape) can come together and celebrate being a woman and the love of the dance. All I have been receiving is hatred and negativity. I was once in a class to learn belly dance and all I heard was rude and nasty comments, even from the teacher. I had also placed a video on you tube of me dancing and showing off the costume that I hade made and all I got were nasty comments on there to. It had gotten so bad that I had to take it down. Now I know that you tube is filled with a bunch of lame brains that have nothing better to do then sit there and leave nasty comments all day long. The ones that left me the nasty comments were mostly belly dancers. (I know because I looked them up.) I will not sit here and list what they have said because some of them were really nasty. I would just like to know if and other plus size dancers are having just as hard of a time as me. Why do skinny dancers find it ok to beat down someone who is not as small as them? (I had enough of that in high school)
I know that I shouldn’t care about what other people think or say but it is hard when you want to share with people and they turn there backs to you when they find out that you are over weight and all you are left with are your cats and your boyfriend. It is heartbreaking to think that a community of something so beautiful can be filled with negativity, anger, and hate.
Sorry for the long rant but I just wanted to know what other people think on the subject.
P.S If there is any big beautiful dancers out there that read this I want you know that there is some one out there that supports you. I may have hung up my coin belt but I will be there for you. (((((HUGS)))))
Better watch out what you say about grannies- those knitting needles are sharp.
I am so sorry to hear about your experience. What kind of teacher was that? Anyone who decides to share their knowledge should be kind and supportive. There is more than one type of beauty. The world would be pretty boring if everyone looked exactly the same. I am overweight by about 30 pounds, but I am trying to lose the weight to be healthier, and not to fit some so called beauty standard. Let me tell you a brief story. I am African-American and made the decision 11 years ago to wear my hair in locs. I read up on the maintence of this hairstyle, and how you have to have a strong mindset to wear your hair like this because you will get ALOT of negative feedback from it. I thought long and hard about it, and did it. It was one of the best things that I have ever done for myself. I love it, and have not once regretted it. It makes me feel beautiful and it shows. My mother HATED it. She once said that she didn't understand why I would do such a thing and how I "used" to be pretty. That really hurt me. My mother is a sweet and wonderful person, but she had a hard time accepting the "new" me. Afterwhile though, she began to notice how perfect strangers off of the street would come up to me and complement me on my hair and even ask to touch it! She slowly accepted that it wasn't so bad after all. Just different. I sometimes have a hard time getting jobs. Some places still disappove of the look, but I refuse to change because this is who I am. I love my hair because it is a part of me. As for you, please don't give up the bellydancing because of a few ignorant idiots. Bellydancing IS empowering and beautiful. The art of bellydancing belongs to anyone who desires to learn it and do it. Even if you can't find another class in your area, just buy some dvd's and some good bellydance cds and dance, dance, dance!!! Please believe that you ARE beautiful. Never let anyone tell you otherwise.
I have to tell you that dreamthief is a far better knitter than I even though she is a young thang.....
This is the woman who put her needles down after she took 18 months to knit an Aran sweater:lol:
Wow this is an old thread! =] Personally I feel there are two sides to this. Firstly I want to say I have nothing against overweight women, they are still amazing women their weight makes no matter to me. However health issues that come from being overweight are awful. Fat is good! Its only when its too much to too little it is bad.That is my only hate for overweight men and women, the stress it puts on the body is so painfuly bad. I don't like seeing it for that reason alone.
But when belly dance is concerned, size does not matter. The comments made by those women were completely wrong, and I hate the way people are with people that are overweight. Its despicable. It should not matter to everyone else what size or shape another is. Personality is everything, not how the person looks. Stupid shallow people. I am so annoyed now! -rantrantrant-
......I also said if she was happy in her skin, good luck to her. I have friends who have had medical people tell them they are overweight and they are healthier than me!
But sometimes the solution is right in front of us and all we need is the right "push"...I've just been through that myself...an event came up, measurements added to asthma and slightly high BP and I thought yup get on the stir fries and fruit.