To ALL Guys Here!!!!!!!!!!

Nur Al Leyali

New member
Hi ,
I am so sorry in advance for this question fellas . Its xtremely personal And I should never ask at all but my best friend is a guy and I love him so much we have been friends for years , He even learned to dance just to be with me . He said I am the only one who accepted him for him and he wanted to be around me till he dies. So now Im gonna ask this for him ( I love you Michell you know who you are.) My friend wants to know if there are any gay guys that are also having trouble being accepted in Oriental dance and if so He would like some advice because it is causing him alot of pain. If you guys dont want to answer thats cool. And sorry Michell but you need some love cutie. :clap: Be proud of who you are sweety. you are a geat performer. All you need is self confidence my baby boy.
 

AngelaJP

New member
I'm not a man but I'd like to share about males in belly dancing in my school.

Gay men are much more accepted by the older female students of our belly dance school here than straight men wanting to learn (or pretend to learn) belly dance. Things are slowly changing now as I have seen 2 men who seem straight dancing with us in class. They always stay at the back.
 

Zorba

"The Veiled Male"
I'm not 100% sure of what you're really asking. Trouble being accepted because they're GAY guys, because they're gay GUYS, because they're GAY, or simply because they're GUYS? I suspect the last - but please clarify. And WHO isn't accepting him?

In any event, its the world's worst kept secret that many male Belly Dancers are gay - in fact probably the majority of them are. I've had the occasional dance sister express surprise that I'm straight (I make it a point to mention my wife early and often - mainly so the gals won't think I'm on the "make"). I'd think that gay guys may enjoy slightly easier acceptance than straight guys for fairly obvious reasons - but I have no personal experience to back this up. An interesting question, I'll ask one of my gay dance brothers about it - see what he thinks.

In relation to Angela's comment about males in the back of the class - this is kind of an awkward situation for the guys. We like to be in the back as we're (generally) big, don't want to block anyone's view, and are often as bashful as anyone else - but in doing so, it may make some of the gals uncomfortable because they're afraid the guys may be ogling them. This is mainly a beginner's level issue.
 

Pirika Repun

New member
In relation to Angela's comment about males in the back of the class - this is kind of an awkward situation for the guys. We like to be in the back as we're (generally) big, don't want to block anyone's view, and are often as bashful as anyone else - but in doing so, it may make some of the gals uncomfortable because they're afraid the guys may be ogling them. This is mainly a beginner's level issue.

One of my dance classes (not Tarik's class) a tall guy (I don't know his sexuality and I don't care about it) always stay in frint raw and he always black my view! I'm like 5 feet tall, and he is like 5-11 or 6! But he alwasys stays in the front... :( Actually, not only him, the other lady in other class (again not Tarik's class), she is like 6 feet tall and she is big. She always come to class late, but she always sneak up in the front raw! As soon as I see her in to the room, I just move the other side from her. Why some people don't care about small people?? :mad:

About GAY questions. I don't get your question clear too, so like Zorba said, please clearfy your question? I'll then I'll ask my gay friends. ;)
 
Hi ,
I am so sorry in advance for this question fellas . Its xtremely personal And I should never ask at all but my best friend is a guy and I love him so much we have been friends for years , He even learned to dance just to be with me . He said I am the only one who accepted him for him and he wanted to be around me till he dies. So now Im gonna ask this for him ( I love you Michell you know who you are.) My friend wants to know if there are any gay guys that are also having trouble being accepted in Oriental dance and if so He would like some advice because it is causing him alot of pain. If you guys dont want to answer thats cool. And sorry Michell but you need some love cutie. :clap: Be proud of who you are sweety. you are a geat performer. All you need is self confidence my baby boy.

I'm not a man...so i can't answer from that perspective. Rather I would say that gay men have a hard time being accepted into society in general. With Oriental dance being a small microcosm of the ;larger world..maybe it is intensified because there are so few males to begin with.
His pain is not unlike the pain of the Goddess sized lady or the uncoordinated as they begin to dance. It is feeling different and not fitting in....

He like others must make his own way,dance his own style, be true to himself that is beyond his sexuality. In other words he must find the strength to accept himself...
Yasmine
 

Pirika Repun

New member
I'm not a man...so i can't answer from that perspective. Rather I would say that gay men have a hard time being accepted into society in general. With Oriental dance being a small microcosm of the ;larger world..maybe it is intensified because there are so few males to begin with.
His pain is not unlike the pain of the Goddess sized lady or the uncoordinated as they begin to dance. It is feeling different and not fitting in....

He like others must make his own way,dance his own style, be true to himself that is beyond his sexuality. In other words he must find the strength to accept himself...
Yasmine

Yasmine I agree with you 100%!

I think beign a gay is difficult to accepted by society anyway.

I'm not a man (even I'm a gay man trap in the female body :lol: ) using art form, sports or anything to express your sexuality is not good thing. Maybe only accept is gay guy in drag queen show. However, other than that is not good things to do. I mean, if I were gay, and I love dance, especially Oriental Dance, but I do not use my sexuality as my dance form or style. Because I respect culture or history of Oriental Dance, and I don’t think USE dance form to express sexuality is disrespectful for any form of art. I do not mean your friend, but in general.

One of my gay friends do not like hung out at Christopher Street (the Mecca of gay street in NYC) because he feels gay people have to be there but not other place. But other gay friend love to be there because he feels comfortable with gay people. So, all depends on the person, and if he really loves Oriental Dance then dance his own way. Not imitate be female or try to be female, but what he feels about the dance. If that appear to be more feminine then that is his style. If more like masculine, then that is his feeling from the music. If he thinks Oriental Dance is just for women, and think he has to be dance or act like women, then he doesn’t accepted by both male and female dancers. I hope it’s answer to your questions.;)
 

BigJim

Member
Well.... I'm a male and I bellydance. I'm also married and straight. I think the issue here is about being accepted... period. He has to know that when he goes to class it's about bellydancing... not that you are male or female or gay or straight. Ask him if he loves dancing ,because if he does, it will show and that should be enough for anyone to see. If he's just there to hang out with you then maybe he should meet you for coffee after class.... I don't do a regular class, just DVD's and the odd private lesson but I do try and get to workshops when I can. I know the worry about being accepted but have found that if you go into the workshop with the attitude to learn and have fun everything seems to work out fine. I am also tall(6'3"). I have found the best spot for a tall person is to the farside of the class... either left or right... that way the dancer behind you has a better sight line... hope this makes sense... thanks
 

Zorba

"The Veiled Male"
I have found the best spot for a tall person is to the farside of the class... either left or right... that way the dancer behind you has a better sight line... hope this makes sense... thanks
Welcome to the forum! :clap: Although I prefer rear-center, I do the farside thing sometimes too. I can see the instructor from just about anywhere - so I try to stay out of everyone else's way. Besides, I tend to blunder a lot when learning something new - its sometimes best that no-one be too close to me!
 

BigJim

Member
Staying to the far left or right has another advantage... when you are learning a step progression to the left you can be the last one in line and not be in the way of the others... when you bring it back to the right you can cheat abit and get a 2 step lead to distance yourself... I'm abit slow footed and if I was in the middle it wouldn't take to long until the dancers on either side would be giving me dirty looks.
 
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